Mmmm....Za

So, I am on a diet right now trying to get cut-up for the warm weather season that approaches. One of the hardest things on my diet is not to eat is pizza. I do really lub that shit and it seems the more I try to stay from it, the more I see it in everyday activities. Take a look at some of these things I ran into and tell me if you also see some subliminal pizza messages.

I was out for a nature hike the other day in the mountainous terrain of Howell and I saw this peculiar rock formation that had a striking resemblance to.....

Pizza The Hutt.

Now after my nature hike I did have a urge to eat some pizza but I thought if I found something else to do that wasn't related to food it would take my mind off of eating Za.
So I got out the old binoculars for a little bird watching an what do I see but some goddamn little birdies eating some delicious pizza leavings. So now you are telling me that birds get to fly south and eat pizza? Sign me the fuck up.



Alright things are starting to seem a little weird but I don't really think too much about it.
I turn on the TV to pass some time and start watching an episode of The Office. Then what do I see, but those ass-holes Creed and Kevin indulging in sweet, sweet pizza.


Ok, no more TV. I just remembered I need to get a new microwave. I guess I'll head down to Sears and take a look at what they had to offer.

The only truckin' model they had in stock, had a mini pizza oven on the top. Alright, mini pizza oven microwave is not on the budget at this time. I guess I'll have to heat food up like my ancestors did with a fire and a stick. What is the conversion rate for microwave time to open flame again? Don't worry, I'll figure it out.

Now on the way home I stopped at a rest area to take a squirt and what do I see....
A Pizza vending machine that's what.

Alright I can't fight this anymore time to give into my cravings for some Za. But what type of pizza could possibly satisfy epic hunger? After scanning the P section of the phone book the best thing I could come up with is..............
Pizza with mini-pizzas as toppings.......Alright back on the anti pizza wagon for another three weeks or until a weird series of events forces my hand to more slices of Za again.